Finding your mojo..

Losing your mojo, your inspiration, your motivation is totally normal! The key is to never stop looking for it. For months I have felt down but put on a good face for everyone but realized that instead of making myself happy I was really trying to find my own happiness. When we go through difficult times we will try about anything to find that place where we are confident, can't stop smiling and wake up every day with a mission.

As some of you know that last few months have been a roller coaster. I moved back to Vancouver, started a job, moved, moved again, changed jobs, got engaged.....got unengaged and that's a lot to take in. That's also the first time I've really told anyone about being #unengaged. Most people are surprised how well I've taken everything and a lot of people don't find it normal how okay I am. I've had a lot of support but didn't think it was worth my energy to be sad about it everyday so I had a good cry, and said tomorrow I am going to get up and be in a good mood and I've done that every day since. My dad always said you are the only person who can wake up and decide if you are going to be in a good mood or a bad mood. So now that I've poured out my heart to you, you might better understand the slump I was in.

I can't really describe what came over me or how it happened, if it was time or the fact that I never gave up on myself. The last three months haven't been my best as far as workouts because I have been really "busy," or at least that's what I've been telling myself. Even saying I'm too busy to workout sounds ridiculous. Going to the gym and getting into my zone is what I do and for the longest time I'd lost that passion for something that made me feel so good. I would think about going and could envision how amazing I would feel after a good sweat sesh but physically I never made it.

Maybe one of the reasons, well two reasons I got my mojo back is one because I never gave up on myself and two because I had accepted that I was okay and that I was ready to get my life back. Last week I went to the library and took out 5 books by Jillian Michaels, my idol, and the first one I picked up was her book called Unlimited, How to Build and Exceptional Life. I've just started it but I feel like its talking, allowing me to respect that I needed time but now I need to get on with life and get back to the things that I'm passionate about.

For me having the gym and fitness as an outlet is one of the most important things in my life as I've found it's the best way to fight depression as I refuse to take medication. The gym is my medicine and when I get there and put my headphones on I am in a totally different world. It's my time and once I found fitness, I found my voice and my confidence. My home. It's one of the most rewarding things I can do for myself.

If you've ever felt lost, or unmotivated I can relate to you and tell you it's okay to feel that was as long as, yes there is an exception, you don't give up on yourself. Don't be too busy, or too tired, or too anything to put yourself first. Make time to get to the gym or whatever it is that you are passionate about because once you accept it, you will find what you are looking for.

Last night I didn't want to go to the gym, but I made a conscious decision and after much debate found myself sweating out 30 minutes on the stair climber with my 10lb ankle weights and then another 50 minutes of lifting. I was back. I am back. I have found my passion for sweat and lifting. It feels so good and I hope if you have been in a slump that you keep pushing to find that break through cause it's right around the corner. Its a long road but know that other people are on it too.

This was a very personal thing for me to share but I think it's important to know that others are out there going through the same thing. No one is perfect. I'm definitely not.

Happy Wednesday Everyone!

Eat. Sweat. Smile. Repeat and tell someone how awesome they are today.

xo
Nicole - I'm back baby!